02.23.09
On Sarcasm
I recently came across this blog post detailing someone’s sarcastic nature, and its rewards and pitfalls: I Bite My Thumb at Thee.
At first, I was going to reply to Scant’s article as a comment, but then I decided it was high time that my nerdy reply to Matt Wilcox about CSS3 from way back in December got usurped from being my most recent post.
So, here is my reply to Scan, and to all others who, like myself, are willing followers of that most cruel god Sarcasm (most-loved sibling to Wit, I must add)…
Scant: I, like you, also tend toward a sarcastic wit and have, to varying degrees, encountered those who take personal offense to it.
I believe the trick (one I have not fully mastered myself) is to know thy audience. Sarcastic remarks aimed at another person are best enjoyed when the other person is game for them, and most preferably is up to the task of responding in kind. Just as I’m sure it is not much fun playing volleyball against someone who is extremely bad at the sport, engaging in a battle of wits with someone who has come to the fray unarmed is often equally unsatisfying. Unless, of course, the target of your derision has it coming, and you are playing to the audience. Or, if you are Christopher Hitchens.
In your volleyball example, I fear that you may have committed a sarcasm faux pas here. Your target was clearly unable or unwilling to engage in a battle of witty insults (e.g. “my serve may improve, but you’ll remain inexorably ugly”), and I presume you could perceive that before your comment. In that light, your comment was little more than an insult, and not being particularly original, did not contain much wit.
I believe that higher sarcasm ought to be more than just stating the opposite of the obvious. Everyone makes comments such as “oh that’s so great” for things they do not, in fact, think are great. This does not take intelligence to do. Similarly, to point out someone’s obvious flaws (such as flubbing a volleyball serve) by proclaiming their failed serve “an amazing hit” does not require much complex thinking. Your point is immediately obvious, as is your attempt at wit, but it is precisely that fact that makes it rather weak sarcastic humor.
Good sarcastic humor, on the other hand, should operate at deeper level, and like a good cocktail, its kick ought to be as discreet as possible. A good sarcastic comment is one that is not immediately perceived as derision. It is best directed at those who need to be taken down a notch. There is, for instance, no point in lodging sarcastic jokes at the expense of someone who is widely recognized to be deficient in the particular area on which you’re commenting. You will only hurt the feelings of someone who arguably doesn’t deserve it, and/or make yourself look like a brute who likes to humiliate soft targets.
For instance, had your volleyball opponent been known to be particularly weak in volleyball or sports in general, there is no need to sarcastically poke fun at his weakness, for it is already obvious and he probably has an insecurity about it. (Poking at someone’s insecurities directly is a mark of bad sarcasm- even if you mean to turn their thumbscrew, you ought you to do so more indirectly.)
On the other hand, were he the captain of the school volleyball team, then he is fair game (provided of course, he’s not going to proceed to humiliate you with 15 aces in a row). In this case, however, your comment about the hit is still not particularly witty. More witty would be something like “so this is why we can’t ever seem to win the championship”. Or, if you don’t mean to be so insulting, but still comment on the incident, perhaps something like “don’t play soft just because I’m a girl”.
Where we agree is that for some of us, a sarcastic wit is simply in the genes. We notice small things, minor flaws in people’s actions or speech just begging to be brought to light, and we have the intellectual arsenal with which to take aim at them. What we must be careful to cultivate, however, is an ability to take those shots with sniper-like precision, rather than a blunderbus. Nobody likes a clumsy sarcastic, they will just appear as mean-spirited. So, precision is the order of the day.
Let’s say someone makes a statement and either introduces a pun or mispeaks with improper grammar or uses a word with a meaning other than their obvious intent. The blunderbus sarcastic comment would be something such as “what a fantastic vocabulary you have; you must be a Harvard man!”. This is pointing out the obvious. The precise, and much more enjoyable for all, sarcastic comment would be to play off the double entendre, or to demonstrate the ridiculous result of interpreting the statement literally (with the words’ correct meaning). This not only applies the insult with grace (an “iron fist in a velvet glove” if you will), but also opens the possibility for a more rewarding exchange with someone equally inclined toward the sarcastic.
